Mom Mental Load: How to Improve Your Mental Health During A Pandemic




Mom load is huge most of the times. This COVID-19 crisis just magnifies that. You are not alone if you are feeling not enough. It’s OK to let your feelings let it out, it’s OK to embrace them.

Stay At Home Menthal Health could be treating for the following feelings

Here’s a short pandemic gut checklist for you: when you’re quarantined at home with your kids, you’ve found yourself thinking …

  • Overwhelmed
  • Exhausted
  • Guilty
  • Guilty for feeling guilty
  • All of the above?

If this is your case, welcome to a very, VERY crowed party. Psychologists and health analysts believe that the coronavirus outbreak is taking a larger toll on women — most specifically on mothers — than on men. I am a mom and for some reason I’m not surprised.

Also, at the best of times, many women face the brunt of unpaid duties, including child care, washing, catering, laundry and numerous other activities. They still bear a huge “financial load”—the physical and psychological responsibility of having to fill out school paperwork, pick up milk, schedule doctor’s appointments, and many other little things that clutter other mom’s minds and hold them awake at night.

For millions of working moms, these obligations amount to “second shifts” that never match any nation’s GDP — and the coronavirus pandemic has exacerbated matters.
Women really have a dual role to play even when they’re working outside the house and especially when they’re in the house. Many moms are more busy than they’ve ever been. In addition to their daily roles and “second turn” tasks, they also help their children slog through remote lesson plans, keep cooped-up young people occupied and healthy, track elderly parents more diligently — all while striving to keep their game faces at work. Add to this an assortment of new tensions that can subconsciously build up.

Additional Situations in Moms Loads During Social Distancing Period

During this quarantine some people have been reading books all this time and cleaning their closets and returning to things they’ve never had, because now they have plenty of time to do it. On the other hand, moms who stays at home and educating young children at home have less time than ever, but suddenly they’ve got this extra burden from all the stuff they think they’re going to do that they just don’t have time to do. )Like adding some activities to their days, because you know, if people are doing it, you should too…. That is an unfair play from your insecurity and overachieving personality.

Some people are grateful that they haven’t lost their jobs, but it’ needs a tremendous deal of commitment to get kids through the schoolday and focus on o work at the same time.

When parents are not working, all their attention is to their families; to teach their children early in the morning before work, and again when they take a break in the afternoon, to get them the exercise and activity they need, to find out where they can safely get food for the next few weeks, to make meals and stretch out those meals, to take care of all the household chores that are needed, to help their children work, and so on Parents are carrying a heavy burden right now.

Tips For Mental Health During Pandemic

Try To Keep Guilt To A Minimum

Many parents have a terrible feeling that their young children can’t be with their peers or that the virtual school doesn’t work. “Parents complain mentally that life is not as it was, even though they have no control of it. Parents continue to carry on the remorse, whether they can manage it or not. This mom’s remorse is not constructive or beneficial.

Avoiding being A Perfectionist Right Now

This is a season for imperfection embracing. There isn’t a perfect one, It won’t look perfect, (so) look at the big picture. Keep your vision and judgment in perspective. It’s about connecting in the right way and figuring out how to love each other. If you can’t get all of it at once, so be it.

 

Get A Flexible But Predictable Schedule Can Help

A routine will make the children know that something is under control and can give them something to look forward to at different times of the day. It allows our life to be a little more structured. There’s supposed to be a wake-up time and a general breakfast time, and then you can work out a walk around your neighborhood.

Focus On What Is Possible Rather Than What Is Not

Try to have some fun with what’s going on. Have a scrapbook, this is about the creation of memories. And in the most stressful days, there can be also lovely moments. Focus on those moments, look for the love, it is all around us if you take a closer look.

Ask For Help In Specific Ways

No, your family doesn’t know how are you feeling if you don’t share that with them. No it is not obvious logic that you need help with the dishes today because you have a zoom meeting right after taking lunch. No, your family doesn’t want to hurt you, and YES! your family loves you, respects you and wants the best for you! To the moon and back.

Now is a great opportunity for moms to ask their family members for specific support, even if that feels uncomfortable or awkward.

If you need it, ask for gratitude. If being appreciated will make you feel better, let them know. If you need help — and you have young children — let them be part of the process of preparing a bed or setting a table or cleaning a table. Have an open talk with your husband and say, ‘I know we’re all stressed out, but is there some chance you can do XYZ? Try to be as precise as possible about your demands. You don’t want to left anything to their interpretation and open the door to frustration.

18 thought on “Mom Mental Load: How to Improve Your Mental Health During A Pandemic”

  1. evans says:

    hello dear, quite an intriguing article you have on how to improve your mental health during a time like this we are experiencing where the ravaging pandemic is spreading over, I must say that this article will go a long way to help people cope in the midst of the ravaging pandemic,, I look forward to sharing it…

     thanks for the awesome article

    1. Nicole Torres says:

      Hi Evans, 

      Thank you so much for your words. It is just a shortlist and unfortunately this is not over yet, so I am looking forward to getting more tools in such difficult times and hopefully share it with y’all. 

      Thank you so much for stopping by, I really appreciate it 

  2. Philebur says:

    Hello there! Thanks for sharing this beautiful piece of information with us, it is very informative and Educative and It is of great importance to me. Also I like way your website is build, the colors and arrangement are soothing to the eyes. It is important that our mental health be improved during this pandemic and i’m very glad i came across this article. thanks a lot..

    1. Nicole Torres says:

      Hi Philebur, 

      Thank you so much for your kindness, I am more than happy that you found it helpful. 

      I’m looking forward to sharing more about this since it seems to be a long journey the one we are now with all the COVID-19 situations.

      Thank you so much. 

      Stay safe

  3. Blessed says:

    Yes I agree with you that this time is burdensome to the parent and most likely to the mother who does all the house work, and still need to be around the kids for obvious reasons. It will equally be a good idea to ask the husband for some help..because this can enhance great love and affection to the couples which will help them with the physical and physiological  mental health.

    Working out a simple but flexible schedules can lessing the burdens too. Thangs for sharing.

    1. Nicole Torres says:

      Hi Blessed, 

      Thank you so much, I totally agree with you. Moms should allow themselves to ask for help. Husbands are the best support you can have when you are feeling overwhelmed. Now that I take a minute to think about it, husbands are carrying a huge mental load during this pandemic too. This has to be, definitely, a team effort.

      Thank you so much for sharing this. 

      Stay safe

  4. John says:

    This is such an important topic at this time.
    You have brought up an overlooked area, about the load on the precious mums, wives and all ladies out there.
    I can appreciate these things like the extra load placed on ladies due to home schooling, shopping, etc.  These things all use to be easy before now they are a lot harder.  I helped out my wife and we have a little girl at home and it was a LOT of work, extra work that we took on, especially for my wife.
    I really think the ask for help part is very important.  So wives don’t be afraid to ask your husbands for help.  This is very real and we all need to pitch in and help out and look out for each other.

    1. Nicole Torres says:

      Hi John, 

      Thank you so much for your words and for helping your wife and your little one. It is a whole challenge. Husbands have a huge mental load too. It is a lot of uncertainty nowadays. Asking for help, being empathic and supportive is extremely important. This is a team effort. 

      Big hugs for you three, stay safe.

  5. Henderson says:

    Truly, there is so much to worry about being a mother at a time like this. I have to add that it can bea very tiring moment because we have so much to think about especially because all the kids are going to be around and we need to make sure we take care of everybody. This is a very good post. Keep up the work you do here.

    1. admin says:

      Hi Henderson, 

      Thank you so much for taking the time to read this. It is great to create awareness about this particular topic since moms are constantly taking care of the whole family. Most of them are doing their best to keep everyone strong and it means keeping their own needs from themselves. 

      Thank you, stay safe

  6. Sharon says:

    Ensuring mental stability is germane into dealing with this quarantine and this is really an area that a lot of people like us would benefit a lot from because it took me a lot to learn about this platform here. To be honest, this is really great to see and I am very thankful that you have shared something like this out here. Thanks so much for sharing this Post out here

    1. admin says:

      Hi Sharon, 

      Thank you so much for taking the time to read it.  Your comment just made my day. It is great to see that your experience can be helpful to others. I think that living under a pandemic scenario is something we are going to learn along the way. We will need so much more to keep our mindset in the right place and make the best out of it, 

      Thank you so much

  7. Sheddy Ovb says:

    Heloo Dear, a big thanks to you for sharing this insightful and interesting post on Mom mental load, how to improve your mental health during a pandemic. This is exactly what my mum needs right now, she’d really been going through a lot of stress lately, improving her mental health is definitely needed. I will definitely forward this to her. Thanks

    1. admin says:

      Hi Sheddy, 

      Thank you for your kindness, it is great to see that men are aware of the mom’s mental load, especially nowadays. I hope from the bottom of my heart your mum gets some relief from all the anxiety we are all exposed during such difficult times.

      Thank you for sharing, a big hug for your mum, I am pretty sure she is extremely proud of you. 

  8. Awinikistevie says:

    Hello there, This is an amazing article that you have got here. Really improvement of mental health can be attained by constant effort to remedy it. While we focus on what is possible and ignore the impossible, I StilI think that getting to ask for help of of great impact as it allows you acquire certain knowledge regarding that which appears impossible.

    1. Nicole Torres says:

      Hi Awinikistevie,

      Thank you for stopping by. I totally agree with you. Get knowledge regarding something that seems impossible to make, is the way it becomes accessible to you. It is not magic, it is empowerment. As far as we believe in ourselves and get the set of tools that we need, everything is possible. The hardest is to assume that we need some help to get some tools, and we shouldn’t feel ashame or guilty for it.

      Thank you so much for sharing

  9. JJ says:

    This article is so real for us moms and shows that we all have similar challenges. When there was this sudden change of events, I thought that it would be ok, I could manage, because it would just be a few weeks. Was I so wrong? I had to be doing work from home and the kids were more than a handful. Thank God for a friend who walked me through ideas to handle the situation. Moms do not have to be super heroes. Having that talk with everyone (as you suggest) was the best thing I did. The kids had to understand that I had to have my quiet time in the mornings, do my exercises, get my online work done and so I drew up a schedule and we stuck to it with military precision. It included everything. This whole experience has been, and continues to be a huge challenge, and your tips really sum it up well. Thank you

    1. Nicole Torres says:

      Hi JJ, thank you so much for sharing this. I really think that it helps a lot to know that you are not alone. Moms are overachievers when it comes to their families and it is not easy to handle everything. I think that none of us really thought social distancing could be for so long. I was prepared for a couple of weeks, after that, I had to find some guidelines and speak with someone, as you do. 

      Thank you for your kind words, I am happy to have you here.

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